I’ve traveled Highway 45 between Houston and Dallas so many times that I know where things are by the mile markers along the way. Some years later, my son would make that journey and sometimes call me to tell me he was “going to Houston.” I would ask him what mile marker he just passed. Mile marker 178 is Buffalo, Texas, and marker 118 is Huntsville. For me, I was in Houston when I hit mile marker 64.
Highways are not the only mile markers. Our spiritual lives have markers along the way. The presence or absence of these markers tells us where we are on the journey. For example, if we do not see the marker of prayer in our lives, then we are not on the right spiritual track.
Forgiveness also has mile markers along the way. Jesus said, “If you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matt 6:14-15). The presence or absence of my forgiveness of those who hurt me is a marker of God’s forgiveness of me.
Such a thought can be heavy on our hearts. In our desperation to have forgiveness, we may try to fake forgiveness for others. Fake forgiveness is saying we forgive, but not really forgiving. Listed below are four-mile markers for real forgiveness. These markers all involve our prayers for the offending person (we’ll call him Bill). Which of these prayers you pray for Bill is an indication of your forgiveness.
The first prayer of forgiveness:
“Lord, please be with Bill and help him see how much he has hurt and wronged me.”
The second prayer of forgiveness:
“Lord, forgive Bill of his sin.”
The third prayer of forgiveness:
“Lord, bless Bill that the rest of his life will be better.”
The fourth and real prayer of forgiveness:
“Lord, I thank you for being with Bill. I am so happy that his life is blessed by you. Please continue to bless him.”
You know you have forgiven when you no longer pray for Bill to repent but instead thank God for the blessings He has bestowed on Bill.
If you want to be forgiven, forgive. If you want to know if you have forgiven, pray. The tone of your prayer and the emotion in your heart will tell you where you are in your process of forgiveness.
Lonnie Davis
This made me cry! I was just hurt by someone and thought I forgave them but I guess I really didn’t. I will pray for God to help me truly forgive then, and I will pray for God to bless them. Thank you!