Dealing with Unkindness

Our text is Ephesians 4:31-32

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another.”

Here is the lesson from this short verse.

Some years ago, I exchanged Christmas gifts with an old friend. I bought him a nice $30 gift. What he gave me was a piece of software. It looked like it came out of one of those discount bins at Wal-Mart. He accidently left the price tag on it and I noticed that the price was 499, which I read as four dollars and ninety-nine cents. I was a little surprised that he thought so little of me. Several months later I found out that part of the number was missing and the price was $49.99.

I am grateful for three things: 

First, that my friend loved me more than $5.

Second, that I learned that one should not judge a gift or a friend by how much they spend.

Third, that I had not said anything about my “cheap” friend to anyone.

The real point of this story is the third one. You will never be sorry for the unkind remarks that you do not make. As our text says, Paul wrote, “Be kind and compassionate to one another.”

Once, after I had moved away from one church, a member of the church had been wounded by unkind remarks from one of its members. I called the friend on the phone to comfort him. He thanked me for my concern and said, “They did the best they could.” Wow! His response to someone’s unkindness to him, was to frame the remark as “They did the best they could.”

I admit that I did not write those words down. I did not need to because they were burned into my heart.

The way the man who was the target of the unkindness handled unkindness has become a life lesson for me. They remind me that I should never make unkind remarks. Never! It is an unchristian thing to do. I hope I don’t fail in this lesson. It is hard to keep so if I do, I hope I will repent and make things as right as I can.

Lonnie Davis